💩 Let’s get real: Everybody poops! Whether you call it dung, doo-doo, poo, turds, cacca (that’s Italian), or just number two, it’s a universal experience. And while talking about poop might make some people giggle (or cringe), your bowel movements are actually an essential indicator of your overall health.
So, let’s dive deep into digestion, gut health, and how your poop (yes, YOURS) can tell you a lot about what’s happening inside your body. Buckle up—this is about to get educational AND entertaining!
Why Should You Care About Poo?
Because healthy digestion (poop included) and your gut microbiome (the trillions of bacteria living in your intestines) play a HUGE role in your overall health.
Your poop is like a daily report card from your gut. Good digestion impacts:
✅ Nutrient absorption – Getting the good stuff from your food
✅ Immune function – About 70% of your immune system is in your gut!
✅ Mental health – Gut bacteria influence mood and brain function
✅ Disease prevention – our gut microbiome and digestive health can impact our risk of many chronic illnesses like: 🚩Autoimmune disorders. 🚩Diabetes. 🚩Cancer
💡 The average person is toting around 7-10 pounds of waste
in their colon. Yikes.
What is Poop Made Of?
Through the complex process of digestion, your body absorbs the nutrients it needs and the rest is excreted from the bowels. Pooping is the body’s way of ridding waste and toxins.
A single, glorious poop is composed of:
🔹 75% water (yes, really)
🔹 Undigested food (fiber, plant matter, etc.)
🔹 Bacteria & microbiome waste
🔹 Digestive byproducts (bile, dead cells, etc.)
💡 Your intestines? 27 feet long—about the size of a school bus! 🚍
How Often Should You Poop?
Everyone’s different! Some people are like human food processors, with a very regular
eat-->poop schedule, while others are less frequent.
As a general rule you should go to the bathroom:
✅ At least 3x per week
✅ No more than 3x per day
People generally know what is “normal” for their body and you should always report any significant changes to your doctor. 🚨
What Should Your Poop Look Like?
💩 The Gold Standard:
Shape: A smooth, long S-shape indicates a healthy diet and proper hydration. If it’s broken up into smaller pieces, this is also completely normal for many people.
Color: Medium to dark brown
Texture: Soft, well-formed, and easy to pass
👉 What’s NOT Normal?
🚩 Green poop = Probably too much spinach (you health nut!)
🚩 Pebble poop = Possible constipation, dehydration, or lack of fiber
🚩 Pale or clay-colored poop = Might indicate liver/gallbladder issues
🚩 Black, tarry poop = Could mean internal bleeding (see a doctor!)
🚩 Watery poop (diarrhea) = can cause dehydration if it lasts too long. Diarrhea can be caused by:
a stomach virus
eating something with parasites or bacteria
stress and nervousness
medications
intolerances (gluten, lactose, etc.)
medical conditions (Crohn’s, ulcerative colitis, leaky gut
👀 The Bristol Stool Chart is the official medical guide to poop. Yep! Theres an official chart for poop.
How Long Should It Take to Poop?
🚽 Under 5 minutes is ideal—you’re not writing a novel in there!
If you’re straining, something’s wrong. A healthy poop should be effortless and leave you feeling fully empty.
Hemorrhoids: The Unwanted Souvenir
If pooping feels like pushing out a brick, you might develop hemorrhoid, which are swollen veins in the rectum—ouch!
A healthy bowel movement should not include a lot of straining, uncomfortable pressure, or bleeding. If you notice red blood after pushing hard or feel some tearing, you may have hemorrhoids. While the dreaded hemorrhoid is not usually serious, you should care for your body appropriately to alleviate the pain and avoid infection.
To prevent them:
✅ Eat more fiber to avoid constipation (plants, whole grains, legumes)
✅ Drink water (dehydration = constipation = hemorrhoids)
✅ Don’t strain (pushing too hard can cause issues)
✅ Squatty Potty? Yep, squatting is the most natural way to poop!
Hard Rule: NEVER HOLD IT!
Noone likes to go poo in a public bathroom, so we may choose to hold it until we get home to our own clean potty room. Or even worse, your forced to hold it because your sitting in traffic (been there, done that).
We get it—public bathrooms are questionable. But holding in your poop too often can lead to:
🚨 Constipation
🚨 Bloating & stomach discomfort
🚨 Increased toxin reabsorption (gross)
If you gotta go, GO! Your gut will thank you.
Healthy Crops, Healthy Craps
What we eat matter. When we eat a healthy diet, we provide our bodies with fiber, phytonutrients, and antioxidants which improve our gut microbiome, digestion, and overall health.
What to Eat for Amazing Poops:
🌱 Fiber, fiber, fiber! (Plants, legumes, seeds, whole grains)
🥦 Cruciferous veggies (Broccoli, cabbage, kale)
🫘 Legumes (Beans, lentils, chickpeas)
🍓 Fruits (Berries, apples, pears)
💧 Water (Stay hydrated to keep things moving!)
What NOT to Eat:
❌ Processed meats (deli meat, bacon) contain Nitrates and are a Group 1 carcinogen, the same category as tobacco!
❌ Fast food & fried food – Slows digestion, causes inflammation
❌ Dairy (for some people) – Can cause bloating and constipation
❌Conventionally grown produce
❌GMO’s
💡 A plant-based diet (with high amounts of cruciferous vegetables, legumes, and fiber) may reduce colorectal cancer by 50-70%
Pooping Around the World
🌍 Geography affects digestion!
As you may expect, due to diet, poo habits are different by geographic region.
Sweden & UK: Average stool weight ~5 ounces per day
New York: Only 3 ounces of poo per day (y’all need more fiber)
Asia & Africa: Over 1 pound of daily dung (thanks to plants and fiber)
💡 "Countries that produce small bowel movements require large hospitals." -Dr. Denis Burkitt
Final Flush: Takeaways for a Happy Gut
✅ Poop is an important health indicator—pay attention!
✅ Eat healthy fiber-rich foods (plants, legumes, whole grains)
✅ Drink plenty of water to avoid constipation
✅ Poop regularly & don’t hold it in!
✅ See a doctor for sudden poop changes or persistent issues
🎉Congratulations! You’re now a poop expert.
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